4 Pines Keller Door Cherry Coconut Brown Ale

Total Score: 5.65/10 Coconut1Cherry1Biscuit1Nonicpint1

This is why I love reviewing beers: every day is something new and sometimes something crazy – there’s a never ending supply of weird and wonderful brews out there. Case in point: 4 Pines Keller Door Cherry Coconut Brown Ale. Someone at 4 Pines thought about putting macerated cherries and roasted coconut into a Brown Ale, it’s a narrative not uncommon with a certain Mr. Ross Kenrick of Bacchus fame, and a reason why I have consumed/reviewed so many Bacchus beers of late – a tongue as seasoned as mine yearns for the occasional crazed experimental brew. So I guess what we have here is a liquid cherry ripe (chocolate bar). I was always more of a Twix man, when is someone going to turn Twix into a beer… Ross?

Poured from a 500ml bottle into a nonic pint.

A: Clear cola-coloured body with a slightly pink-tinged khaki head that settles to around half a centimetre. Aye there be cherries in this brew me lad. What is with 4 Pines obsession about fining their beers? Let us have a bit of haze FFS. 6/10.

S: Cherries and coconut mingle with a hint of vanilla, exactly as it says on the can – if you like cherries, and you like coconut, you’re in a cherry-coconut fantasy land mon frere. The main question with this and many other fruit addition beers is: does it smell artificial? In this instance I would say (_) – that was me holding my right index finger and thumb about 5 millimetres apart. Real deal with this I reckon. 8/10.

T: Hits with sour cherry from the beginning, though it’s not overly tart, it’s just enough to make you think “hmmm, sour note”. Then in comes a whole load of not much, yeah yeah the cherry and coconut flavours are there, but whatever happened to that whole sweet/bitter dichotomy that beers are universally renowned for? This is dry, cracker dry, middle to finish. Aftertaste hints at cherry. TBH this is much more bland than I was expecting. The major problems are body (mouthfeel) related, which could have been sorted out with oats… needs oats bro. 5/10.

M: Surprisingly (and detrimentally) thin in body with a watery middle and some carbonation thrown in for measure. 5/10.

D: This brew had promise in the aroma but completely fell apart from there onwards – it’s far too thin, muted and missing sweetness/bitterness to live up to its promise, oats would have fixed that… maybe a bit more ABV as well (although 5.5% is nothing to scoff at). Another disappointment from 4 Pines, didn’t expect it from a Keller Door though, bring back the Oaked Baltic Porter already! 5/10.

Food match: Cherry ripe choc bar – need to get that sweetness from somewhere.

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