Monteith’s Southern Pale Ale

Total Score: 4.7/10 Lemon1 CutGrass1 Barley1 Nonicpint1

Monteith’s is a NZ brewer that has lately been slipping into the clutches of mediocrity like so many other once decent craft brewers, and Southern Pale Ale [spoiler alert!] is no different from 150 Lashes, Minimum Chips and many other beers out there diluting a world class beer pool with their complete unnecessariness (is that even a word? Spell check thinks so). I’m not really sure who the target is for bland beers with nothing going on but once craft/now macro brewers keep introducing them to an oversaturated market so there must be people who think “Corr blimey this is a good drop!” not sure who these people are but whatever Monteith’s/James Squire/Matilda Bay, you go do what you have to.

Poured from a 330ml bottle into a nonic pint.

A: Presents a clear light amber body with a foamy white 1 cm head… looks like a standard macro Lager/PA – nothing special here… I’m so bored with this beer already, tempted to tip it out and get a nice rich Stout in my glass. 6/10.

S: Aroma is a hybrid of a Lager with grassy/grainy notes and a Pale Ale citrus hint – but it smells artificial – like some added lemon essence. Not much else to note with the aroma so let’s move on and get this sorry affair over with. 6/10.

T: Yep, lemon, grains, a hint of grassy character thrown in – tastes more like a Radler than anything else, certainly wrong for a Pale Ale, but then again what passes for a Pale Ale these days is beyond me – every second beer I see in the pub is a “Pale Ale” now, seems synonymous with how the term “Bitter” is used in Australia to represent a cheap macro Lager. 4/10.

M: Mid to light, a bit watery, with a moderate gassy carbonation… welcome to CML (Cheap Macro Lager) country. 6/10.

D: Why did Monteith’s even bother to make this average at best beer is beyond me, I know I used that turn of phrase earlier “beyond me” but it’s hard for me to understand why perfectly decent craft brewers have begun releasing watery flavourless beers, they seem to have lost their way but its endemic across the board with many other decent brewers doing this. My only hope is that my negative reviews will reach other brewers and maybe, just maybe, these crap beers will stop being made… not bloody likely but I will continue to hope (and tip these beers down the drain after I’ve reviewed them). 4/10.

Food match: It’s difficult to be enthused by a beer this boring… sooo chips.

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